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Archaeologists find ancient visitor centre below new Stonehenge visitor centre
Archaeologists have found earthen jam jars, crude tea towels and an early pen with a feather stuck in it. A team of archaeologists has made a startling discovery near Stonehenge – an ancient visitor...
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23 years after message in bottle, woman is finally arrested for littering
Lethal A woman who threw a message in a bottle into the North Sea more than 20 years ago has finally been tracked down and arrested after it was discovered in the Netherlands. Louise Darling, from the...
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Police seek the notorious ‘Uncle’ after spate of nose thefts
Look who’s playing Voldemort in the school panto! Police in the village of Harold are today hunting a shadowy underworld figure known only as ‘the Uncle’ after an epidemic of nose-stealing left scores...
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Miliband invoiced £15.95 for Labour Party no-show
Ed Miliband has been sent an invoice for “not showing up” in his position as head of the Labour Party. Mr Miliband apparently agreed to lead the party in 2010, but subsequently seems to have realised...
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ISIS claim responsibility for destruction of ‘superhenge’
An artist’s impression of some rocks, in happier times. An online video allegedly posted by ISIS has claimed responsibility for the destruction of a stone circle in Wiltshire. The henge features around...
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Bowl of petunias found stranded on Norfolk beach.
A Forensic Artist’s rendering of how the bowl of Petunias might have looked, before impact As if dealing with stranded sperm whales wasn’t enough, bewildered Norfolk locals were today confronted with...
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Aston Villa found buried beneath Roman Villa
Waste land may be bought up by NCP. Following the unearthing of a Roman Villa during a barn conversion job in Wiltshire, the archaeologists had another surprise when they dug up a mosaic floor and...
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Nuclear war narrowly averted as Trump loses The Codes
“So I lost the codes. It’s no big deal.” The White House was in meltdown today following President Trump’s tweet “OMG I lost the codes!” only hours before he was due to declare all-out nuclear war on N...
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Discovery of water on Mars will not avert hosepipe ban, says water company
Not to mention the pot holes… While scientists are over the moon with their discovery of a water lake on Mars, residents of North West England have expressed disappointment that their hosepipe ban will...
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Spirit of Schrödinger’s cat invoked to solve Irish border problem
A séance held by the UK Brexit team has called upon Schrödinger’s ghost to help resolve the Irish border issue. “What we need,” said Mrs May, “is a border that exists in the EU’s mind, but which is...
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